Friday, June 16, 2017
I was surprised enough to realize this blogdrive site is still going strong...wow! I was even more surprised to realize its been 6 years since I posted...double wow. Where did they time go? I can't fathom how it seemingly disappeared. I read the last two posts. Who was that person? I feel so different with each passing year. I know I'm the same underneath the drudgery of my cra8zlife but I don't feel the same. I can never just update you on what's happened. I got remarried, I experienced empty nest, I moved countless times searching for god knows what. I changed jobs several times. I both lost and gained weight. I went to concerts, I hid away from life, I grabbed it by its horns, I danced the night away, I slept the day away... yet..... I found my way back here. Wow. To this site. Writing. Still. Need. It. Double wow. I'm going to try and continue unveiling of my soul on paper. You with me?
Posted at 01:39 pm by itsmedownhome
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Stepping Back in Order to Step Forward
I've lost something in my rushed and hurried life. It happened quite by accident but it happened nonetheless. I quit taking time for me. It's like standing at the edge of a busy highway, all tense; using all your senses to check this way and that so you don't get run over when all you gotta really do is take one step back to get out of harms way and breathe easier. So why oh why choose such a busy and chaotic life? I think it happens upon us while we are distracted and looking the other way-- we get saddled into a busy schedule; roped into committments we shouldn't even make (yeehaw, not).
Well I've gone and done it. I've taken a step back. I'm not consciously putting myself in harms way again. As of yesterday I have decided to revamp. I'm going to write because this crazy passion of mine has healing powers. It reaches the depths of my soul like nothing else can. It keeps me thoughtful and stabbing at profound. And, I'm going to exercise because it makes me feel invigorated and it will prolong my life and I don't enjoy looking in the mirror and thinking, "who the bloody f is that?"
I'm taking back what is already mine~ which crazy enough is ... me, muah cuz I belong to me and noone else and I get to do what I say.
So what I'm doing in essence is stepping back in order to step forward again.
Posted at 09:09 am by itsmedownhome
Wednesday, September 01, 2010
Mister M's Roadside Confessions
I can always tell if something is wrong with someone by their mouth. Why is this? I can't even describe this strange perception but to say that within about ten or fifteen seconds I am innately aware of something amiss.
That's how I knew my electrician was ill. After I told few of my friends I'd run into him at the store they asked me if I knew he had cancer. No, he did not tell me. Lastnight he stopped by my house and I flat out asked and he confessed, yes, he is terminally ill. I asked him why he didn't tell me. His answer was, "Tee you are such an upbeat person and light. I need someone and somewhere I can keep the mood light. Can you do this for me? " I hugged him and said, "I love you and I can do this."
We ceased talking about it and instead looked at his Harley. He's spending the last journey of his life traveling cross country and visiting people he knows. I told him life is about relationships. He smiled and said, "Yes it is Tee."
He promised to stop in and say goodbye before he makes this final journey. His smile was larger than life and that's just the way I want to remember him.
Posted at 02:36 pm by itsmedownhome
My son got a tattoo in my livingroom lastnight. Seems sort of a strange and random thing to come home to, ya know? Well, my house is anything but boring and peaceful... though I pray & strive for it.
With my 17 & 18 year old that sort of existence is completely out of the question. I'm still waiting patiently for the transition into their adult lives...you know the time when they take over their own lives and start living on their own? Tell me, will this ever really happen?
On a nother note. I got me a new boyfriend. Wooht Whooht. Well, he isn't really new. He is from way back. I've known him forever. I've loved him forever. I thought he was lost to me forever...yet god has ways of throwing opportunity and options in your direction....if you are mindful and insightful enough to grab ahold the rope and pull.
I am thanking god for much these days. I love and am loved in return. What a concept. Seems so simple and it really is. I think we both get that a relationship has to be fed and nurtured and built. Love lies in waiting, a seed awaiting water....once fed that flower blossoms. Mine is in full Bloom.
Posted at 01:11 pm by itsmedownhome